So what’s really going on?

my other mother has cancer. She found out yesterday and has refused to eat. She’s diabetic and is giving up.

I reviewed her pathology report, it’s not a true death sentence even at her age, she can’t see that. I called my mom to talk to her on a more peer level.

I’m just sad. I’m tired of this shit.

C rightfully so cancelled our vacation. It was the one thing I was looking forward too. I’ll have to just find something else. Lol, good luck to me since that was free and I only needed spending cash. I even considered making nice with some people I hate to get away. Not gonna happen. Maybe a yoga retreat for 3 days. I’m not sure.

Lol, as im writing this for the first time since his surgery my little dog is kicking his sisters ass. Well that’s a good sign.

Also I’m pissed because I admitted what I’ve known for the past year. I told the bride to apologize to her sister. To tell her I’m sorry but seeing her son…..it just hurts too much right now. 

Life has changed and my ex will be getting remarried when the divorce finalizes.

I will not even be a stepmother. She will. She’d better treat him right. 

So for now I’ll stay in my cacoon. I’m done letting people in.

Sir said wouldn’t it be nice to meet someone local, truth sir, no. I have no desire to even attempt to let anyone else near me. 

It took almost a year to trust you and even still I have my paranoid moments.

I’m tired of hurting.