My head

it feels like it’s going to split open.

I sent Sir an email yesterday. I spoke with him many times but he had an off line day. 

I’m not letting it go to the back burner. It’s things I need in order to be ok. To not be doubtful.

In the meantime I’m at work, and I just got out of a long, hard meeting and the majority of my coworkers are idiots and I have no idea how they keep their jobs.

Tonight I just want to be……

My mood is sour again. It’s ok, that’s how life is sometimes.

And as far as going to Santa con tomorrow….No one has any interest at all. My mother and I are hardly speaking. 

Also I know you think that would be a great way to lift my spirits, but it’s just a bunch of drunk frat boys in costumes.

I just don’t have the love of the holidays you do…..and that’s ok. I don’t miss a big tree or a large family. It was all fights and problems.

I’m glad you enjoy it.

Remember last year, when I wasnt even going to decorate? I only do it for you, not for me.

It  makes a little sad that you were so happy last night and I’m so grumpy.

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