Just a day

The original plan was to go to get my mother’s birthday gift. She decided she did not want to go because she wanted to buy a wardrobe and has coupons or some crap that are only good in march…fine. Problem with this is that she may not be aware ….. I have a life and now she’s not getting her gift until her birthday. I’m busy next week and I told her this multiple times, but I’m pretty damn sure she paid no attention.

If it’s something she doesn’t want to hear, it doesn’t exist.

Again she started with the “I want want you to find a monogamous relationship and settle down.” I think the worst thing I could have ever told her is that Sir and I have an “open” relationship. I just didn’t need her putting pressure on me. Plus the truth, she also doesn’t approve of the age difference and I know this comes from a good place, her having lost my stepfather and starting over again in her 50’s.

She feels that if I had a more traditional relationship, I wouldn’t struggle so hard to make ends meet. I told her I do not want to live with anyone, so please stop. I mean really….it’s my life and I’m going to live it as I see fit. She said she knows me better and there is no way I’m happy like this. So again, Am I Happy? No, lately I’m not.

There was a part of me that was looking forward to this birthday brunch coming up, but after talking to her…..nope. She first off was upset she was not invited with a plus one. Really, I asked her “did you get an invitation?” She said no, but your Uncle was invited. Umm, no he wasn’t, my aunt and female cousin were invited. So I had to explain to her this was done through facebook and without my knowledge, I took over the guest list and it was all females except for Thomas, who incidentally is more female than most of the women invited. My aunt was the one that asked if my male cousin could come, he was not invited. Not to mention that there will be liquor there and even though her boyfriend has almost 20 years sober, he prefers to not be around that…..so yeah, let me invite one guy to please you and have him be miserable???? Then I tel her that they are not paying for it, it is truly just an invite to brunch. She got pissed.She said they did this without me and expect me to pay….I’ll come alone. Why is she so much like dealing with an ungrateful child?

So tonight I need C to put up the cost for brunch, I asked her to weeks ago and she hasn’t. Hope she has the cash to cover the bill, because my family thinks it’s a free meal.

I really didn’t want to write this complaining about her, but that’s been my day so far.

Last night was nice. out with old work husband for a couple of drinks. Talked shop, work and marriage. He’s in counselling with his wife and they seem to be making improvements. Ops, well yeah, I did invite him, but I knew he’d say no, since female A is going. They had a brief and dramatic affair a couple of years ago.

Sir says that when my birthday passes I’ll be better. The understandable blah will go away. If he’s right, I wish it was over already.

I had played with the idea of taking back my vacation time until my cousin said she was coming up. I know Sir likes me to save it for when he’s around, but I really need to not have to deal with work and all the other crap leading up to my birthday. I really need just me time. I have no intention of sitting in my house and my cousin won’t let me. Plus I have to remember I took this job mostly for the vacation. I’ll still have 3 weeks this year after this time off.

I’m heading to the gym in an hour to work off the anger today has left me with. I think the worst part was my mother telling me “your not getting any younger”. Fuck, thanks mom.


One thought on “Just a day”

  1. Still young at heart! Surround yourself with people you love and love you back, think about what truly, truly makes you happy and throw yourself into doing those things. Carve out time for you. Take care of you. Do not let negativity take you to low points, surround yourself with positivity, beauty, love and joy.

    Liked by 1 person

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