Not lazy…Busy

Sorry Sir, I do know how you like to read a blog in the morning. Yesterday just got away from me. Gym then city then hair, then drinks.

The city was fun and we had a great time shopping and I got a complete new kit of personal makeup for 35 dollars! I do love elf, so good and so cheap. I even brought a new pair of walking shoes. That’s the end of spending money, no more treats, I have a plan that if I can avoid shiny things I’ll be mostly debt free by the new year. I used to be before the marriage and I’d like to get there again.

I’m pissed we chose the wrong purple for her hair, but I’ll fix it. You could tell she was happy anyway to have a color again instead of “normal hair”. So unbelievably like me at her age. We talked about how when we go to events and dress up it feels right and like all of the other days of the year, we feel as though we are in costume.

Drinks with the much organizer was more interesting than I thought it would be. Turns out he started the much to make friends after drama destroys his old group and after 2 years, he still had no people to go out with. I made it very clear to him, my group of people are very much friends and although some may play, it is not a pickup group. So at least we will take him out and see. I know the feeling of not wanting to walk into a party alone. He feels his age really puts most new people off and I explained to him, it’s not that. He basically has no game, no…I didn’t say it like that, but that is the truth. He’s too forward yet not forward enough. Plus his main thing is the single tail and that is something that straight off not many people want to do right off the bat in public. He said the sub he plays with now, he only plays with because she can cum from pain and he enjoys that. He made it like iit was something so special. I kept my little secret, something said don’t tell him. I also made it clear with the exception of FGD, all of my play partners are woman. I don’t want him to mistake my kindness for interest. I have to remember that some…most men will.

Today should be a good day….gym, facial (thanks drunk grouponing), mani-pedi (the only acceptable time for anyone to touch my poor broken feet) then off to N. Yup, more bike riding, pol time and my first breaking of a fast in a traditional household. Oh she brought over some food that she made on Friday and it was better than anything I’ve ever tasted. Her Hummus was like butter. So I’m saving most of my calories for later!!!

I think I over booked myself this week to keep my body busy so my brain won’t go to a bad place. I know it eventually will, but I’ll deal with it and like my 40th birthday, I’ll accept it and move on. I have to remember I did waste a decade, but I’ve also done more living in the past couple of years than many have in their whole life. I do have to admit….I’m getting a little tired.

It’s funny how life runs in cycles. I was thinking the other day that things are very much like they were in high school. Not in a bad way. I was very unsatisfied with where I was in life and decided to change it all. I started again and built a very big and close group of friends and naturally took over as the leader. Organizing trips and events and acting as lead of a merry bunch of misfits. mL had said something Friday about the party this Friday being my call. He said, you are the glue that holds the group together and that whatever I decide they will trust is the right thing. That felt good but is a shit ton of pressure to put on one person. As much as I would like to be with my friends and having fun, there’s too much on the line to bring them to that party. I have to put the good and welfare of others before the selfish needs of me. So I’m going to have to find something else for us to do or maybe I’ll just hang with my other D/s relationship, little R and take a break from the bigger group, recharge…..She may be a pain in the ass.but I know that she needs me and like Sir has helped me…I’m helping her. A year later she has an apt, a new job and she’s slowly learning not to be offensive, but that one will take a bit more time and effort to perfect.

 

 

 

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