Oops

Yeah, so maybe yesterday’s blog should have had a warning label on it. I was in a bad bad head space and ugh, that’s where I was but not where I ended up.

I made it through work and felt like death by the end. I just wanted my bed and my puppies, but it was my becky birthday. He said something that really stuck with me the other day. I need to go out, I just need hugs. I felt so bad and I know exactly where he’s at. He’s newly divorced and his girlfriend lives further away than Sir. 

So no matter what, I was going fir a drink and giving becky the hug he needed.

Then home a kink friendly vanilla girl cane by. She also needed the company and escape from the pressures of the holidays and family  

We chatted till a little after 10.

As all if this is going on, I’m texting with a swingers girl. Really nice but physically not my type. Too masculine, but maybe I need to open up and try something new. I don’t generally do bitchy girls, but I’m at the point where I don’t really care, I just want that tit to tit feel and a mouth on my cunt. The package means little, as long as they are a decent person.

Oh then I got it into my head to suduce n. See in the vast types of relationships I’m kinda having all of them. So I started an analysis. 

SIR – my rock, the one person above all I trust.

N- my best friend, with the same soul as mine.

FGD – my service top and someone who will always give the right advice

The l’s- there no matter what, they always make me laugh, even though I know inside they are so very fucking sad

So the lists and analysis went on.
As I’m writing this I’m also texting FGD AND N. I’m done with missing out, so I decided to grow a set of balls and just put it out there. 

And I did

And, she has been thinking the same thing. So today I start a new chapter. A real fwb, no dynamic, equals.