The thing you do

This weekend is my slow weekend. Vanilla at first glace. Slow for me means doing things, normal tasks that keep me physically busy from 7am to 8pm.

I also noticed I did something else this weekend without really meaning too. In an effort to not move to quick with N I think I started looking for other partners to keep me level and distracted. I have paid little mind to my swingers profile. It’s such a bother to weed them out.

For instance there’s this “D/s” couple that….well, they are idiots. They say that and it means he sticks his cock in her and she the bottom. That’s the only way to describe them. They have little to no idea what the dynamic means and when I ask a very direct question I get nothing in return, like nothing. Then there’s the party thrower. I thought as a nice thing for Sir I’d meet up with him to see if his parties are any good, but his guest list is …..blah at best. He sent me a new one and I’ll look to see if it’s any better than the last. Plus his parties are too big. Unless of course he’s not being honest with the amount of people that show.

There was another couple that I just never heard from, but they have a house in the mountains and cell signal is spotty so I’l chalk it up to that. There’s a woman that I’ve been back and fourth with for 2 years and she sent another message, but I think she’s a general time waster.

I figure if I keep myself looking I won’t have a repeat of “her”.

There was a little time I carved out on Friday to talk to the hostess. I knew she could give a females perspective on this risk I’m about to take. She’s done this and so far it’s worked out very well for her. The problem is she’s domme, so I think it’s easier for her to in ways keep the upper hand.

The key is going to be time management. I have to not overbook myself and when I look at the big picture of this month, it looks like total burn out of my own making. I mean who considers getting up, running, protesting, brunch, then an orgy all in one day? L says I’m the busiest person he’s ever met. Sometimes I just want to be. I did that Friday night. All things done around 8 pm and for a couple of hours I had quiet. I love quiet, unless it’s when I’m overthinking and for some reason, I think pure exhaustion my mind was still.

There was a big effort to make my surroundings different and more peaceful this weekend, maybe that helped. I know what didn’t help, the damn snow! I guess that’s just winter, what can you do?

I’m also trying to rationalize how much I miss Sir with the insane need to be alone. That’s a really hard thing. I adore when he’s here and when he’s gone the dog and I go a little crazy, but I still can’t imagine having anyone in my space for longer than a week.

My DE cousin called last night, it was a funny conversation as always. My birthday is only a couple of months away and she’s looking to come in for the weekend so we can do another staycation. I think she really just wants to go to a party and get a spanking. Some how we got on the topic of lactation. Her very vanilla partner has a total fetish with trying to make her lactate. So I had to tell her the Christmas eve story. She got a real kick out of that.

Today is Sunday and Sunday is for brunch and yoga. Since I gained a couple of pounds with Sirs last visit, I’m going to pass on the brunch. You would think this means an hour of yoga and that it, sadly no, it’s another day of running around and getting things done. This week should be a good one. Every night is filled with something to do and for the most part I’m looking forward to it.

Now I’m just babbling…time to run

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