A first

Not mine, but a first for N.

Yesterday my spirit was gone. I had just hit a wall and the stress was palpable. My personality was gone. I know going out helps this, but I really just wanted to go under a blanket and cry. Sir said no, I was going out.

When you feel shitty, never let it show. So all done up and to a party. The three of us and a promise that I was first on the bench. Somehow N got it into her head that she was going to spank me. FGD is the official spanking supervisor and he did his job.

She did a nice warm up, something I suck at and then used my paddle and eventually the firehouse. She checked on me many times, but sadly she couldn’t bring the tears. FGD saw that and stepped in when she tired out. The first slap of the hand I knew the change and burst out crying. I needed those tears like oxygen. The entire scene lasted about an hour and a half. I could have gone longer but N needed to play as well and I had a curfew.

I freaked out a bunch of Newbie’s I went from crying to cuming, to crying, to hysterical laughter, then back to crying. Funny the laughter scared them the most. That’s when you know I’ve totally let it all go. I never feel better than when I laugh.

I think I have a plan that may help us to not drop so bad. N and I play Tuesday, then the social Thursday with a light maintenance spanking and Saturday we had plans to go out. One of the main reasons I didn’t want to play and haven’t been is the drop. I can’t drop with all the work shit going on, so the only alternative is to continue to play.

This is really not the best way to keep balance, but I have to for at least the next week until work levels out a little.


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