Time to make some plans

I had it my head that I need to become a yoga teacher. I needed to go through training and then turn this into another job.

Today in the middle of a very challenging class that I was kicking ass in, it hit me.

I’ve loved doing a few things like I love my practice, Ballet, hair and makeup. Each one of these I made into jobs and guess what? I hated them. I turned passions into chores and lost the love of the art. I decided, nope I’m not willing to do that. So no yoga training for me. I’m going to take that money I would spend and travel.

I’ll still teach but I’ll do what I do now with hair and makeup and use it to increase my dharma. I’ll teach to those I know and love and I will not charge for it. I will give knowledge and do the studies of the anatomy and spiritual side on my own. I’m sure to get help from the many yoga teacher’s I know. Crazy lady will be upset because I won’t be able to sub her classes for her, but when I tell her the why behind it, she will agree.

I had another moment of clarity today. I was walking to class and there was a woman ahead of me pushing a stroller. she was her and I was me. Her life was not mine and that was ok. crap that took a long time, but I see it. 40+ years and I can accept it, so I’m thinking on the 11 year anniversary I’m ok that I’ve made my life. All the choices we make lead us to where we are and I am here.

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